Kashann and Clan

Last night as I sat up in bed reading my scriptures, a PBS program was also on TV. Even with all that stimulation, and it was only 9:30, I dozed off as usual 5 short minutes after getting in bed. Brent was watching the program and he at one time, said, "this is pretty good". So I woke up and watched it with him. I am good at that- going from deep sleep to wide awake, and then right back to deep sleep. It's a talent.

Anyway, it was a program about relationships. Being married with 5 kids, I am always stewing about improving relationships.

They mentioned a couple things that I thought were excellent. One marriage counselor said that he finds that good marriages are usually built on 3 L's.

Lust, Laughter, and Loyalty.

Now I consider myself somewhat an expert also, as I have been happily married for 13 plus years. I totally agree with the L's. They are all important to me. And these things don't just happen. You have to concentrate on them. Because kids, work, and worries, and laziness easily take over and crowd out the L's.

The other thing that stuck in my mind this morning was this. They have done studies and found that one way to have a long lasting fullfilling marriage is
to do things together that are Novel and Challenging

Think back to the first few months when you met. It was all about the challenge and the newness. It ties into the L's. You had tons of fun- Laughter. There were sparks- Lust. And you were starting to enjoy one another's commitment to the relationship- Loyalty. I still need all these to be happy.

I think fixing up a $30K house together while in Dental school, motoring the Erie Canal in pouring rain, crisscrossing the country in a Double Decker Buick, booking a cruise 2 days before it leaves from Miami when you live in New York, . . . all these things would fall under the Novel and Challenging category.

Just some thoughts this morning.

One of my goals for 2010 is to have the best year ever for Brent and Kashann. I hope I have figured out by now how to do that.