A little more

I put off posting, then once I get going I can't stop. Especially when it's Monday morning, the house has been pretty much cleared out of bodies, I have no car, Marcus is singing away and jumping on his trampoline, and it seems like the day is stretching before me in such a nice beautiful way.

Here are some glimpses of recent winter activities.

I have often mentioned that I run around the park for exercise. It's a tiny park so that involves lot's of circling. Caroline always begs to tag along which is totally feasible in a park this size.Sometimes when I get a spare second, I just head out in my jeans. It's not like I am going to start sweating in this weather. I don't even have to shower when I get back.

Marcus is allowed to jump on the bed between the hours of 8 a.m. and 6 p.m. As long as Dad isn't around the bed is free game. I don't think 30 lbs. is going to hurt a thing.

Savannah doesn't get bored with long winters as long as she has plenty of felt and my sewing machine. It amazes me that she voluntarily uses the sewing machine. My early memories of sewing involved Mother forcing me to sew a dress once a year, terrible headaches from my confusion and frusteration with the whole activity.
Her recent projects include hair bows for her sister's birthday, felt food for her brother to have picnics, and a bunch of pets that she gave away to her friends. This is her penguin.

I snapped this picture Sunday before church in the primary room. We are usually early for church and hang out in the primary room while I work on stuff. Savannah got into the habit of rounding up a soft chair for her personal use. Just to make things clear that it is for HER personal use she added a sign last Sunday. You can't imagine the brawls this one soft seat causes every Sunday between her and Kennon during opening exercise.

Can we please send the 12 year old on? I can't take 4 children in primary any longer. Especially the honery one who really doesn't want to be there.

Kennon is 12

Kennon had her best birthday ever. Just ask her.

Her parents caved and decided to end the begging and switched the ear piercing age from 14 to 12. What is she going to bug us about daily now?

So scared right before. This girl almost fainted the night before when her Dad pulled out a sliver. She also would never let us pull out her teeth so we would do it in her sleep. She was determined to do it though. Right after she pulled this face to let us no that it wasn't too bad.

A cell phone? Nope, she got that too. Three minute a day plan. We may up her minutes on it for good behavior. It's way too boring of a phone for her liking but she doesn't dare complain. She is working hard coming up with ways to bedazzle it.

We ordered pizza the Saturday night before and let her have the living room for 3 hours with her friends while we hid upstairs and gave her some space. I guess Caroline found her way down to the party and is trying hard to steal the show here.

Now she is done with primary. Or is she? Our primary presidency insists that she still come to opening exercises and give her share 0f primary talks when her name is drawn out of the mailbox. I totally am on Kennon's side here. Once you are 12 you shouldn't have to set one foot in the primary room until you are back in there in a few years as a teacher.

She also got a pretty purple wool coat that I made sure fits me too. I am pretty sure that she doesn't know that or she wouldn't have accepted the gift. I am not saying it fits us the same. For me, it's more "fit's like a glove" look. But, yes, we really are getting that close. I am sure that I am shrinking. Kennon is just one size behind me in tops, 1/2 size in shoes, and at least 10 sizes in jeans. For some reason that part of her body is taking a lot longer to catch up to mine. It is super fun to stand by her and realize that we are getting so close in height. And it's not like I am short.

Birthday Breakfast and a short scripture study on February 4th before school with our new 12 year old.

I feel so lucky to have a house full of girls that are getting older. They are keeping me young. And I love sharing belts, scarfs, jewelry, headbands. I wouldn't even have this stuff if it weren't for them informing me that it's a necessity. All three older girls had a church activity last week with some very talented leaders. They made about 5 hair accessories each. And now we all can wear them!
Brent and I both took her out to the mall to pierce her ears then we shared some chinese food in the food court. It was a fun tradition that luckily we will get to repeat ever couple years for a while now.
All these others were anxiously waiting at home to have a party with us when we got back. We had Mother's Mud Pie. Kennon has that every year because she isn't a big cake fan. We are all big mud pie fans, though. Of course. It's all about ice cream around here.

Our lives are flying by it seems. Trying to enjoy it as much as we can.

Turning 40 in style

We have had a busy week and though it was fun, frankly I am glad it's over. Two big birthdays in our house. Number 12 and the BIG 40. It was hard to give both monumental events equal time and focus.

Brent kicked off the week of his 40th birthday by attending a 100 day party with his classmates to celebrate the beginning of the end of dental school. He stole the show with TWO awards.

First of the awards -"Most Thrifty". Someone dug up a bunch of dirt. He bought a $30 K house in the hood for his family, drove a '93 Buick that he once built a double decker in so his family could ride comfortably home to Washington, bought a old moped to save on gas for his ride to school, eats a bag lunch every day at school. . . I actually wasn't invited to the party so I am just guessing at all that was said, but I heard it was pretty good and totally accurate.

His second award was for Best Hair. Hard to believe that this head is the Best of Buffalo, but it's official.
Speaking of the Buick, it was time for the yearly state inspection last week. Brent drove my van and asked me to take it in. I dropped it off, conveniently across the street from the mall and was told to be back in 2.5 hours. I came back a 1/2 hour early with several shopping bags in tow and was told that they had been trying to call me. By the way, I lost my cell phone the week after I got it. I really haven't missed it much, since I never got the chance to get used to the ammenity.

They had been calling to let me know that . . . First of all "The hood won't open up".

I went out to the shop with them and had them bang on the hood while I pushed the button and it opened like a charm. Their other complaint, "The lights won't turn on."

I climbed in and pointed out the light switch that clearly had been jimmy rigged down by the heater vents. Problems solved. Now they began the inspection. I went back to the waiting room for another hour awaiting the verdict.

"I'm sorry, but it didn't pass."

I still had to pay of course but now my sticker would be removed and good luck getting home without a ticket. The whole experience was totally embarrassing to me and I told them repeatedly that this was MY Husband's car.

So we were back to a one car family all last week. Brent worked on the car out in the cold for quite a while Saturday and ordered some parts. He is confident that he'll have it back on the road soon. Many more miles left on that Buick.

To celebrate 40 years, we had a few of Brent's friends and their wives over and enjoyed what seems to be Brent's favorite decade so far- 1980 (the last hair decade for him). FORTY candles is a lot to light up all at once. Brent broke out the torch for the occasion. Dressed in our 80's garb, and Brent firing up the cake, we felt like we were coming back to our trailer trash roots. I was planning on posting our great outfits but once I uploaded I decided that maybe they weren't so great after all. Here's a little glimpse of the trash we picked up at the local thrift store. I actually found most of my stuff in my daughter's closet. Leg warmers, big belt, fingerless gloves. The 80's are back . Too bad all the hair is gone.
His lifelong friend Eric Benson from Washington made us a home video that I surprised him with during the evening and all present were able to see the old humble abode on Casper Lane. And it was truly humbling. Now they know why Brent is so proud of his new digs here in Buffalo.
Camille found out about an hour before that this was an adult party. She was devastated that she wasn't invited and ran into her room bawling. She came out a few minutes later and posted signs all over her curtain (she doesn't have a door) like "No Adults Allowed" and this one which was my personal favorite. It read "Party's Over. My Hearts Broken."

Camille is a sweetie.

On Sunday the whole family was invited to a Birthday lunch where each of us had a present for the aging man of the house. Brent also was surprised with some letters from friends and family from back home.

I can't believe I am married to a 40 year old.

Life has been awesome ever since I met Brent and he moved me into his trailer down by the river. I anticipate that the next 40 will be even better . . . and hopefully don't involve any more single wides or cheapest houses on the block. But either way though I am sure that I will be happy with this man anywhere.

Here is Brent - on the job hunt. So many hours and not yet anything to show and tell.

We have been doing a bit of ward shopping lately. This is what Mormon people do before they accept a job somewhere. Church is a big part of our lives so we want to find a good fit. It's the same church and true everywhere. But we have 4 daughters and having a couple nice friends in the ward that have the same Mormon rules - no mini-skirts, no boyfriends, no east coast cussing -will go a long way. There are zero of these nice friends (no kids their age AT ALL) in our ward here and it's tough. Kennon thinks that it's just her parents who are weird. I need to introduce her to the big mormon world in Utah and blow her mind.

We have already shopped three times. Once in Tennessee, another time in N. Hampshire, and earlier this month in Pennsylvania. Only one of the three so far struck out, and we left town without even interviewing.

We may be striking out ourselves with this venture, though. I always regretted looking up the Buffalo bishop the first time we came here house hunting. He cleared his schedule, gave us a personal driving tour all morning and made sure he asked lots of questions along the way. By the time he got out of our car he had finished his full interview and by the time we moved in he already had my calling picked out for me. Relief Society President. It was a good opportunity to grow, but can you blame me for wanting to lie low this time around?

We've tried hard to remain inconspicuous each of these times since while visiting a ward but Come on, You can't miss this handsome family of 7. We never leave the building without getting the third degree as to our future plans, testimonials that this is the best place on earth, and dinner invitations for the evening. Darn Nosy, Mormons. You can't lie low among Mormons. Caroline made sure that we didn't make too good of an impression, though. We only spent one day with the members in PA and Caroline managed to offend two of them. The Sunday school teacher and the stake president's wife. I was talking to the Sunday school teacher after class when Caroline ran up, took one look at my companion and interrupted the bright eyed lady.

"Wow, Your eyes are Sooo surprising!"

She was confused and didn't take it as a compliment. She pressed her if that was a bad thing. Caroline just repeated how surprising they were and then popped her own eyes open as wide as she could to demonstrate what surprising eyes looked like.

Later that night after dinner at the stake president's beautiful home Caroline decided she was bored with the play room and went exploring in the basement. These older homes in the East don't have typical basements. They are the laundry room/ storage room and are so cold that you usually just run down and run back up as fast as you can. Things get dumped with the plans to take care of it later. . .when you have your coat and gloves on. Apparently she had the same aversion to her basement as I did, from the look of the piles of stuff just down the stairs. Her piles must've been more significant than mine have grown though. Caroline went down, came up wearing a princess dress and tiara she found down there and walked right up to the cook and asked

"Excuse me, Why don't you ever clean your basement?"

Whenever I see Caroline corner an adult, I really need to get over there a little quicker.

She did save our bacon during Brent's interview at the dental office though. The Dr. invited the entire family in for pizza with his full staff. They were all sitting down to lunch when he led us in. They immediately cleared the table and had us sit down and eat while they all stood around. It was super awkward since the idea was that Brent would be replacing his current associate and he hadn't offered that info to anyone. They were all doing 20 questions on us trying to guess what was going on in the office that day. We got lots of questions like, "So are you guys moving here?" and "What are you doing in the area?" Usually I can think of plenty to say but this time I was at a loss and just concentrated on my pizza.

So we let Caroline do the jabbering. First she surveyed the room and realized that she didn't see the Root Beer on the table to go with her pizza. So she asked where it was. Then she told Brent that this is where he needed to work so he could eat pizza everyday. Before long she decided that she would go ahead and sing them her original song she wrote on her guitar.

"Nobody's being nice to me. Nobody on my rock star team"

She included all the verses which are different each time . She always comes back to the "Nobody's being nice to me" line because it seems to be the crowd pleaser. She has several songs she is preparing for her big rock star debut someday but we all agree this one is the catchiest, plus it rhymes.

She told us that her stage name is "Star Rock" but Savannah complained, "Caroline you need something original."

She thought for a second then smiled and announced her new name.

"Star Original Rock"

Welcome to my rambling

Winter is back. I spent about 40 min with a shovel this morning on our little patch of pavement just to get rid of last nights fall. Yesterday we got hit pretty hard too. As long as we have a small driveway I like shoveling snow.

The way I see it is- It's a great way to enjoy winter. You aren't cold and miserable and you are getting a great work. Marcus came along and decided to venture into the tall snow in the backyard. It was up to his shin. He walked around the whole thing before deciding he couldn't take another step. His boots were full of snow and he was too tired to do anymore trudging. I went out and rescued him and found his little boots full of snow. And bare feet and no snowpants either. Camille had brought him out to join me when she left for the bus. He is warming up in a hot bath right now. Singing away.

Last night we had an amazing thing happen during his bath. He suddenly hollered "I gotta pee", hopped out, sat down on the big seat and shot off, with perfect aim.

I was so shocked since this is the first time he has had any interest, he thought of it himself, and jumped out of a WARM bath to do it. And from my experience this is a sign that he will probably be potty trained in a year or so. I never get my hopes up with little stuff like this. Though it was pretty exciting and we all ran in to scream and congratulate him.

While I was out shoveling this morning Kennon was across the street waiting for her bus with the other middle school students in the neighborhood. I am not allowed to take any pictures of Kennon at her bus stop - but picture this.

Here is Kennon standing alone and staring straight ahead not talking to anyone, totally sticking out with her flower headband. Ten other kids rough house all around her, every couple minutes someone going down in the snow. They are all yelling and it pretty much consists of F this and F that. I probably heard that word I hate 50 times in the 5 minutes I shoveled nearby. I kept stopping and staring at them, debating what I should do, and what wouldn't embarrass Kennon. I finally decided she would never forgive me if I hollered at them so I said nothing.

I hate what my kids are forced to put up with. It made me think two things.

First, Maybe we should move to the south where kids are more respectable and study the bible during recess. I don't think these inner city kids are bad kids themselves, it's just that they are raised so differently. I would like her to be surrounded by religious people regardless of the faith. She feels so weird here to be religious at all.

My second thought was that we need to really work hard to make our home all that it needs to be. More love and understanding. More fun. More attention and time with each child. Somehow a better study of the scriptures together before we send them off to the bus stop. We read every morning, but so many times it's frustrating because I don't feel like it is beneficial because everyone is so distracted. We have tried reading less verses and just focusing on a subject but that seems to not work either. So we just trudge through, two pages a day. We stop and talk about them, or at least Brent and I do, but no family discussion takes place. Their minds are on different things. Usually Marcus running around the room singing and stealing the show.

It gives me great strength though to remember that my own family's scripture session while growing up were just as bad. Maybe worse. Every morning at 5:30 Mom walked down the hall singing, "DEVOTIONAL" as she passed by the rooms on her way to the piano. Then she played through one verse. I hated both of these things, the sound of Mom's "Devotional" and our piano, because they were always associated with getting my tired body out of bed. And I had to get it out fast because whoever didn't make it by the end of the 1st verse, had dish duty that evening.

Once we got to the table we somehow woke up enough to argue, complain, tell mom that it was taking too long, push each other around. . . pretty much do anything but concentrate on the scriptures. I am sure my parents wondered the same thing I do everyday as we all run off in separate directions after prayers. Why are we doing this when no one is getting anything out of it. . . and it certainly isn't any fun?

The thing is . . . it's not true. I never jumped in and discussed the subjects my parents wanted us to, nor bore sweet testimony. . . nor did I ever want to be there. But I learned the scripture stories very well. And those stories have made a huge difference in my life. I have always had (or been working on at least) a daily scripture study habit since I left home. I developed all the habits and convictions that my parents wanted to instill through family scripture study and family prayer. What if they had given up because it wasn't the perfect family experience we all want it to be?

I really think that our efforts to provide our kids with spirituality will pay off. The things that are important to my parents became important to me. It's so interesting that it doesn't seem like it at the time. So I will keep trudging on.

As far as making kids ride the bus with all that garbage I would love some of your thoughts. I don't want to shelter my kids from the world because I think we all need to grow up and deal with it somehow on our own. I have never thought that I should homeschool them just to protect them from other people's examples because there is no way to totally do that.

At the same time I hate forcing them to endure it, by sending them out to the bus everyday.

That's why we need to move to the bible belt. Any thoughts on the amount of swearing in the south?

Stuck

Brent and I haven't slept well for a long time.

Probably since last August. We were fresh back from our last carefree summer and a lovely road trip to see family in Washington and embarking on the final year. It was time to get serious about real life and where that real life was going to be lived.

Most people getting out of graduate school have a plan. Even students a couple of years behind Brent will tell me where they are planning on settling and why.

And here we are. Pretty much in the same stage we were when we started. No clue. I guess we aren't like other people that plan and execute. It seems like our eyes and hearts are focused on adventure not on settling. Sometimes I think we are looking at our future like a vacation. Brent will look up a practice opportunity and get all excited. It's in the middle of nowhere, we could live on a lake, go snowmobiling all 8 months of winter, hot tub when we need a break and enjoy our cabin on the lake that we would be getting for a steal. Never mind that it is an hour from the nearest ward, 3 hours from Target and so far into Maine that we would be in a New Brunswick, Canada Stake. But we get all excited about the house on the lake though.

After further research we find a little snag that causes us to move on. By the next day we have bounced over to a new spot on the map. And I'm not talking about one area of the country. I am talking from Maine to Yakima, Washington to the southern tip of Texas.

Basically we are pretty sure that we could be happy anywhere. So our job search is far and wide.

But time is running out. One of these days. . . very soon. . . Brent needs to commit to a job and then I will be making a big announcement. And we will be getting lot more sleep around here, I hope.

But by then it will be too late to comment on our choice. So if you have anything to say that you think will help. . .

Say it now.

Here are some things to keep in mind.

A small town with very few dentists would be ideal.

I like humidity. I have occasional bouts of psoriasis. It's been pretty much a non issue since I left the deserts of Washington.

I like green hills and trees, with mountains in the distance.

I like swimming in lakes.

I like a white winter.

I like Target.

Oh and Kennon wants to live by her cousin Katie. She lives in the deserts of Washington along with about 100 other people we are related to, that we love and miss.

How is my list? Does it ring any bells?

I can't decide how important the last one needs to be. Do we make it a priority above all else? It makes things really hard to figure out.


So we are still hovering on the bridge. Not sure if we are going to cross and find a new adventure or head back to the safety of the side we came from.

Enjoy it while it lasts

The weather lately has been topping out in the 40's. For three consecutive days last week I went running in the sun while the kids played outside. We do this several ways. Sometimes Caroline rides her 3 wheeler and we circle the block over and over. Other times we all go to the park a few houses down and I race around it while they play. Sometimes I stuff Marcus and Caroline in my one kid stroller. I just can't help take advantage of sunshine and above freezing temperatures in January.

3 day weekend in PA

Today is laundry day and I'm not enjoying it as much as last week. We went out of town and I ran off and left everyone's mesh socky bags. Wonder how many socks will be sucked away in my washer today? I figure there are hundreds of them stuck in there somewhere. Where else could they all be hiding?

We planned another dental interview trip last weekend. We would visit the church there, stay overnight, swim in a hotel -all of us were so looking forward to it . . . except Kennon. Lucky for her, she was rescued by the Ashworth family. They called and wondered if she wanted to go along on their 3 day family extravaganza to the Palmyra Inn for the weekend.

So on we went without her. It completely changes family dynamics to lose your almost 12 year old. I don't even think we had one eye roll or one "Dad, you are such a cheapo" the entire trip. Things were really chill.

On the other hand, Savannah found her work load doubled. Kennon may make life interesting, but she is also my right hand man. And it was hard to introduce our family multiple times without her. Brent's interview was in the BEAUTIFUL Williamsport Pa area. Seriously. This is a hidden gem in the state of PA. Fairly remote but it has everything I would need to be happy, besides extended family of course. This is our only trip picture taken. Savannah had the camera and I told her to make sure she got a picture of the hills surrounding us everywhere we went. This area had it all. Rolling hills, a large river, nice people (the stake president's wife and family of SEVEN daughters and one son invited us over to Sunday dinner at their 1894 small mansion), a Target-my one stipulation and the reason we ruled out Vermont, and a wonderful dentist who may or may not hire Brent. We definitely are no closer to making up our minds about our future destination after this trip though.

But we found another charming place to live. We both have had a February deadline in our minds for a while now. But now I'm wondering how we possibly will figure it out by then.
Last Thursday, my friend Cathy, gave us last minute tickets at Shea's for Curious George Live. I was a little disappointed in the creativity of the show but it was a fun event to get dressed up and go downtown to as a family. Our friends, the Fordham's, also got free tickets and came along. During the intermission Savannah went out, and ran right back to ask me to come sign a release so she could be interviewed for a Curious George commercial. Kennon wasn't interested but the rest of the kids ran after and all got put in front of a bright light and microphone. Marcus ran off halfway through, Camille did nothing but smile and chew on her lip, no matter how many times they tried to ask her a question, Savannah smiled away and found a few clever things to say, but as usual Caroline stole the show. She is planning on being a rock star and I guess she figured this was her big chance.
As long as they don't get a hold of this picture, I took after the show.
I hope you get a chance to see it. It won't be here long. She'll for sure, demand I erase it, if she catches sight of the blog anytime soon. It's too funny not to post and laugh at for at least a few hours while she is at school, though.

Now I need to go take care of something I have put off all morning. About an hour before we got home from our trip, Marcus started hollering, "I peed!" When his cries became increasing hysterical I inspected the situation, finding a completely dry diaper hanging on his leg and his little bum sitting in the puddle of the pee that he was hollering about. The only thing to do was to move Caroline out of her booster for the last hour so Marcus could have it.

Caroline heard us making plans and said, "NO! I won't do it."

But, I finally convinced her that there was nothing else to do and she needed to help us buckle up Marcus safely. She moved over to a seat, buckled up, then lay her head down and stayed that way frozen the rest of the way home, terrified of another meeting with a state trooper. Dad reassured her that he had a perfect argument for our defense, inspired by the fine words of the last state trooper we met up with on the same freeway.

"Are you a father, because if you are, you have to understand that no good father would knowingly ask his son to sit shivering in a puddle of pee for an entire hour!"

You'll have to see my earlier indignant state trooper post if you missed it. Brent's fathering was severely questioned right in front of his children.

So time to go figure out how to take the car seat apart sitting by my back door. It's probably beyond my abilities. It has to be done though or I won't make it to Target today and I've got quite a streak running for the month of January. Target in January gives me one of the biggest high's ever. I keep thinking I need to stop and then I remember how I feel in February when all the $3 shoes are gone. I only wish I would've bought more, not less.

To all worn out mothers of 5

Brent gave me an odd Christmas present. No, not the 3 minute a day cell phone. . . that none of you will ever get the number of since it is far too risky to start handing that out.

He gave me 5 small mesh laundry bags. I don't know what brought this on because he doesn't do laundry EVER. . . but I guess my constant complaints about my difficult life got the wheels turning.

Each kid has their own mesh bag hanging in their closet. All of their used undies and sockies go straight off their body and into the baggie (Theoretically. We are still working on the "straight" part with some of them).

On laundry day I collect the zipped up bags, throw them in with a load, then deliver them back to their room for them to match and put away. No more ever growing miss matched sock basket and no more wasting time sorting panties and sockies by size into five little piles.

It is genius. Maybe that's what these bags were always intended for, but it took someone way smarter than me to figure them out.

You should be doing this too. Some people have told me that they safety pin socks together putting them into the laundry basket??? Try getting 7 people to take the time to do that. Not gonna happen. This is . . . MUCH better. It's pure genius!

Very good Christmas present, Brent.

Marcus's Nasty Nose and Brent's cool sweatband

I didn't even think of telling the story to go along with the picture in the previous post because bloody Marcus's are quite common around here. But since several of you asked, this was the result of one of his latest spills. And there isn't much of a story. I was down in the basement doing laundry, when Kennon starts screaming hysterically for me. I find her and Marcus covered in blood. He was right next to her watching cartoons but she has no idea if he fell off the bed or just tripped into the dresser.
The first thing that I check is the teeth. My sister's 1 year old knocked out a couple of hers after a fall last year and I keep thinking it's only a matter of time until Marcus suffers the same fate. The teeth all were intact and after washing him up we narrowed it down to the nose which to me looked bad enough for stitches. Brent was cleaning the church. (Of course, that's what he does every Saturday, even though he was heard after the 12th time or so swearing, "That is the last time I will clean this church!" He was down there the next Saturday). I called down and insisted he come home and make a decision, stiches or not. He arrived home 3 HOURS later (he took his helper, Savannah, shopping for new boots on the way home) to find Marcus's nose still dripping blood. His opinion was A) the nose would be fine, B) boys look good with scars, C) Did I really think it would be possible to hold him still enough to stitch him up?
The follow up on the story is that the next day, and everyday since, Brent has walked in, took one look at his son and said, "Whoa, that is a little worse than I thought. We probably should've had it stitched up."

I finally found a Wii game that I like. Outdoor Challenge. I am terrible at it of course, but it is tons of fun and great way to warm up and get a serious workout indoors while having a blast. Brent and his buddy Richard faced off Sunday night. Richard agrees with Peter. The left side of the mat is not working properly. I think Brent figured it out a long time ago and that's why he always competes on the right.

The best match however was Caroline vs. Richard. They were jumping over logs and neither of them could were very good at keeping the back of their pants up.

Yeah, that's gonna leave a scar.

Last night as I sat up in bed reading my scriptures, a PBS program was also on TV. Even with all that stimulation, and it was only 9:30, I dozed off as usual 5 short minutes after getting in bed. Brent was watching the program and he at one time, said, "this is pretty good". So I woke up and watched it with him. I am good at that- going from deep sleep to wide awake, and then right back to deep sleep. It's a talent.

Anyway, it was a program about relationships. Being married with 5 kids, I am always stewing about improving relationships.

They mentioned a couple things that I thought were excellent. One marriage counselor said that he finds that good marriages are usually built on 3 L's.

Lust, Laughter, and Loyalty.

Now I consider myself somewhat an expert also, as I have been happily married for 13 plus years. I totally agree with the L's. They are all important to me. And these things don't just happen. You have to concentrate on them. Because kids, work, and worries, and laziness easily take over and crowd out the L's.

The other thing that stuck in my mind this morning was this. They have done studies and found that one way to have a long lasting fullfilling marriage is
to do things together that are Novel and Challenging

Think back to the first few months when you met. It was all about the challenge and the newness. It ties into the L's. You had tons of fun- Laughter. There were sparks- Lust. And you were starting to enjoy one another's commitment to the relationship- Loyalty. I still need all these to be happy.

I think fixing up a $30K house together while in Dental school, motoring the Erie Canal in pouring rain, crisscrossing the country in a Double Decker Buick, booking a cruise 2 days before it leaves from Miami when you live in New York, . . . all these things would fall under the Novel and Challenging category.

Just some thoughts this morning.

One of my goals for 2010 is to have the best year ever for Brent and Kashann. I hope I have figured out by now how to do that.

Five

Eight

Ten

Eleven

39 (for a couple more weeks anyway)
All back in school this snowy cold day.

The 1 year old and I have no place to go.
I'm not complaining.

Christmas 2009

After three freezing Christmas's in New York, we were happy to leave a White Christmas behind and head south on December 23rd for a Tender Tennessee Christmas with my sister Candice (who found out over Christmas that she loves playing the Wii and as a beginner can beat us all) her husband Peter ( who is the worst monotone narrator ever for a Christmas pageant and actually skipped half the dialogue to get it over with ) and Baby Laura (who got a new pig for Christmas thanks to her crafty cousin Savannah)

Isn't that the biggest baldest head you've ever seen off to the left?

They all live in Nashville so Peter can attend Vanderbilt Law School. As we drove south and things just got greener AND WARMER we made up our minds that we are done with Buffalo Winters.

Getting off wasn't easy. I could hardly sleep the previous night. I had a lot on my mind. I was sure that I had thrown our video camera in the Home Depot Garbage across town. While waiting for Brent earlier in the day while he shopped I cleaned out the car. One grocery bag full of garbage and another bag of items to take into the house. I remembered putting the camera and video camera into one of the bags. Once the car was clean I threw the trash bag out into the large can near the Home Depot entrance. Later, when the video camera was missing it was pretty easy to conclude where it had gone. I was too scared to say anything though and just went to bed and tried to sleep. By 5:00 a.m I was wide awake and Brent heard me leaving the bedroom. He asked what was up and I told him that I couldn't sleep because I had too many worries.

"Like what?"

"Well, . . . I think I threw our video camera away"

I had made up my mind to drive to Home Depot and search the trash. Brent insisted on coming with me though we both figured that a day later searching a parking lot garbage was futile. Twenty minutes later I found the exact can and it was still full. I started digging under the trash mostly consisting of stinky coffee cups which I was throwing all over myself like it was a race or something. But it was worth it because underneath those drippy coffee cups, I found my BAG! I searched the contents twice, just to be sure. But no video camera. After that, we drove home and I felt so much better. The camera was missing. But I hadn't thrown it away. I didn't look for it once we got home. Just loaded up the car and off we went without it. (Later, I found it in Nashville among the stuff I had already packed I was glad of course, but I can't help but wonder if I am losing it.)

We convinced the kids to let us just have a little Christmas in Nashville. One present each. It is so hard to fit 7 people and all their suitcases in our van, let alone presents. Caroline was determined to bring a stuffed animal although we outlawed any such personal items. She came out wearing this elephant and said that we couldn't stop her because it wouldn't take up any extra room because it was a hat and she would wear it the whole trip.

We spent our first night with Brent's cousin Dale and his family in Delaware, Ohio. They have 2 girls which we all fight over and one son that cried before going to bed because he wanted to have a sleepover in his room with Marcus. Dale is a real dentist and had lots of good advice for the future dentist. After family prayer Brent pounced on Dale and before long all the girls were wrestling away trying to help out their own Dad. We finally got Brent down and I snapped a rare picture of Brent on the bottom of the pile.
I feel like I am going backwards here. OK, first was the trash digging, second the wrestling match, third our arrival in Nashville Christmas Eve just in time for a mexican dinner prepared by Candice, a very boring nativity pageant we found in the Friend narrated by Peter wearing toule, and the opening of our new jammies. The fourth thing that happened on the trip was was all Brent's fault. After unpacking the gifts later Christmas Eve he realized he had left something we needed to operate the Wii. It was almost 10 p.m. when we raced off to Wall Mart only to find it closed and not opening up again until the day after Christmas. I argued with the guy blocking the door for awhile telling him that our Christmas was going to be ruined if he didn't let me in. We had a new game (Outdoor Challenge) and we had planned to play all day so they wouldn't miss their presents we had left at home. But just like the Who's, Christmas went on just the same. Candice had made all of the kids homemade presents like monogrammed pillows, purses, dolls, and aprons and they didn't even notice that they had been jipped. And instead of playing Wii all day they crafted all day with Candice in her craft room, and had no time to be bored. The day after Christmas we made it to Wall Mart and came home and let them open the Christmas present we had saved. It really was as fun as we had hoped though I am just as bad at it as I am at Wii sport. Candice on the other like I said, was pretty amazing. Peter couldn't handle having his wife beat him and was sure the mat was not working correctly on the left side.

Brent discovered after unpacking the first night that he had forgotten his socks. . his belt. . . and his dress pants. . . and as usual only brought one shirt that we all would have to endure the entire trip. I remember listening to him while he was packing and he was really concerned about what shoes to bring for his interviews and how these shoes were taking up his whole bag. . . and I guess he just got sidetracked and never got passed the shoes. He ended up packing an entire suitcase of shoes. . . and nothing to go with them. I couldn't believe it. It worked out nicely for him, in the end. We stopped off at a mall and got him new stuff, which in reality he needed a wardrobe update anyway.

Brent had a couple interviews lined up on the way home in Eastern Pennsylvania so we had a drive ahead of us. On the way home I started counting up the number of states we would drive through (7 on this trip) and that got us talking about how very few states we had left before we hit ALL 50. Brent has been to two more than me, Alaska and New Mexico. But besides that we just have to plan a trip to Maine, Alabama, Louisana, Mississippi, Louisiana, and Arkansas and he will have hit all 50. How many people can say that they have passed through all 50 states? So much for Brent being behind in the game.

This is too hard for me to organize and is already taking too long. So I give up.

One afternoon at Candice's I lay Marcus down for a nap and he started hollering a few minutes later about something. Brent went in and tucked him back in. I asked him what he had been saying and he said, "Pfff, I don't know."
A few minutes later he was still yelling something out so I went and listened next to the door and very clearly heard,
"I have a owie" over and over again. I went in and found the kid dripping in blood. He had jumped out, got in Brent's shaving kit. I couldn't even tell where the cut was. It was all over the bed, and his face and hands were just dripping. I thought for sure he had multiple contusions but after washing him all up we just found a really bad one on his thumb and a little one on his neck. Kennon and Brent really got after me that I started cleaning him up immediately and neglected to take a "bloody shot". He never really cried in pain, just wanted some help cleaning up since he hardly wanted to go to sleep all bloody. Once cleaned and bandaided he went right to sleep and I am hoping he won't been shaving again for several years.

The drive home was wonderful. I love road trips. Brent drives the entire way and I just keep the food and conversation going. It's the best.

My favorite section of the country we visited was Northeast Tennessee. We are toying around with the idea of living there (among other places). The funny thing is that we would be moving to the Tri-cities. That's what it's called, just like our former home in Washington. Somehow I don't think our family will appreciate the joke if we tell them we are moving to the Tri-cities and then we mention the word Tennessee.

The thing is that we can look for perfect places to live as far as climate, beauty, economy but it comes down to finding a job for Brent. We don't have any prospects so far in either of the Tri-cities -East or West. Lots of opportunities elsewhere though providing they like Brent, but we just need to make up our minds which is the part we aren't so good at. They all sound good to me. Why do we have to choose?
By Pennsylvania it was freezing again and I wasn't looking forward to going farther north. We were driving right by so what the heck let's delay it for just an hour and take the kids to Hershey, PA to their favorite chocolate factory. It was such a short time ago we were there that we still had the "It's the milk chocolate" song stuck in our heads and we sang right along with the mechanical cows. Marcus enjoyed the ride and the free chocolate at the end.

We didn't get home until 8:30 p.m. on the 30th and we still had to have our traditional Christmas eve so nobody felt jipped. Brent and the kids are stuck on a Chinese takeout tradition, that I fight because it goes against all Fielding tradition, but I have to admit the cleanup is so much nicer than than all the cooking Mom used to do. The next morning the kids seemed a little disappointed because it's hard to separate Christmas into two and still make each one seem like a big deal. Their big present this time was a good one though that will be enjoyed every single night for at least 4 or 5 more winter months here - an electric blanket each.

Oh, and Brent surprised me with my very first cell phone Christmas morning. I have started complaining the last 5 or 6 years that I needed one and I guess I finally earned one on account of good behavior. Brent wanted to know how many people I was going to tell my number to and then reminded me that I only have 3 MINUTES A DAY. I told him I was going to write it on my blog. Here it is XXX XXXX. I get 3 one minute calls a day. If you email me we can make up a schedule and maybe by the end of the decade I can manage to have a one minute conversation with each of you.

We spent New Year's Day working all day, rearranging bedroom furniture to try to keep all of our children happy and somehow solve the fighting problems. Kennon and Savannah are now back to single twin beds. We have our fingers crossed that not forcing them to sleep together will do wonders for the relationship. Caroline and Camille who now have the queen bed again are so happy to be be able to snuggle once more. For some reason there is always peace in two rooms in our house and no peace in another. Brent spent all day moving things where I told him too.

Once done he let us know that this was the last time the furniture would be rearranged until he was arranging it into the moving truck, which will be here before we know it. Four more months of dental school, a house to sell, and a job to find and we are out a' here.

Christmas is coming. . .

Santa made a early delivery at our house on Sunday night!

Jackie Frost singing for the grade school play.

Making gingerbread houses with our neighbor girls.

Finally got done with all the hassle, now hoping life slows down and I can relax.
Merry Christmas to you all!

Oh, and Brent PASSED the boards!

HERE is our Christmas Card 2009 we sent out to friends and family all over the country.


NOW and THEN
. . . it’s good to pause in our pursuit of
happiness and just be happy.
-Guillaume Apollinaire

And Now, Here are the answers to your Top 10 Questions.

1. No, Brent doesn’t have a clue where we’ll be moving after his May graduation.
2. No, Kashann hasn’t decided if she is done having babies or not.
3. No, the 290,000 mile Buick has no plans of kicking the bucket anytime soon,
but Kennon’s crossing her fingers it happens before she’s 16.
4. No, we aren’t counting the days till we are out a da’ Hood.
Believe it or not, we like it ‘round here.
5. No, almost 12 year old Kennon’s legs are not as long as mine.
They just look like it because they are skinnier.
6. No, 10 year old Savannah hasn’t been snatched up yet by a talent scout, though she had a starring role in her first short film last summer.
7. No, living in sunless Buffalo hasn’t cured Camille, (8)of her freckles nor caused her to pick up nasty east coast habits like swearing or smoking.
8. No, Caroline (5) hasn’t stopped talking even once since we unhooked her oxygen. We never want to forget what it was like when she lost the desire to talk to us and constantly remind ourselves to be patient with her enthusiasm.
9. No, it isn’t true that girls are sweeter than boys. Marcus proved it.
10. Yes! We feel very grateful for the many things God has blessed us with-
Faith, Family, and Friends. All of which bring us so much joy.

Merry Christmas 2009 With Love, The Casper Family